Advice: ‘Brutal Realities Have Impacted My Behaviour’

I’m very emotional. I cry and hurt easily and do not try to hide my feelings. After the death of my Dad, I have been taking more family responsibilities. And then my girlfriend decided to move on, which was as tough to face as the reality of my father’s death. It has been a tough time with a lot of challenges. I sometimes feel I’ve been successful in handling these challenges, and sometimes feel I have not. Facing these brutal realities has impacted my behaviour, and I sometimes lose my cool, get highly angry, have mood swings, and try to hurt myself. Sometimes, I let the anger go by breaking a mug or throwing a pillow or other object. But I have difficulty pulling out of these negative thou

Balancing your digital life with real life

At the risk of being judged, I’m someone who is very active on social media, mainly on Facebook and Twitter. I use these platforms to promote mental health, reduce the stigma around mental illness—and yes, also for being social. When I recently told my husband about some upcoming events in our city, he asked, “Where do you hear about all these events?” My 5-year-old daughter quickly replied, “Mamma finds it on her WhatsApp groups!” We had a hearty laugh over this, but the reality is that over the years, social media has become a huge source for information – whether brain-tingling, new research or mindless fun – and an important tool for creating awareness, staying in touch with friends, and

Advice: ‘I Feel I Should Divorce Him’

I had an arranged marriage last year and did not know my husband well at the time of our wedding. After living with him these several months, I don’t feel a connection with him. We are always fighting because our thinking doesn’t match: he is very orthodox; I like to live my life on my own terms, and he wants me to change. He has lied to me about a lot of things that are trivial but I feel I can’t trust him anymore. I have given it a lot of thought and I feel I should divorce him but my parents think otherwise. I don’t know what to do. Can you help me decide for myself? Read the advice on

So, We Talked About Sex (Education)

​ On 10th July, The Swaddle hosted its first community event with a panel discussion on sex education in Indian schools. With five amazing panelists and moderator Tara Sharma, the discussion ranged from hilarious to sincere as our experts articulated their arguments and drew on real-life experiences... Read the full article on

Inside Out: The power of acknowledgement

I just managed to catch a screening of Inside Out – what a beautiful movie it is! It explores the human mind, its emotions and complexity with so much ease. The movie is a gentle reminder of how we can choose to be in charge of our emotions. Along with a beautiful perspective on embracing sadness along with happiness. To do it so beautifully with a storyline and no sermonising makes it stand out. My favourite bits about the movie are about the core memories and the various islands in relation to these memories. All of us have core memories which nourish us and give us our stability. In therapy, I often ask clients to dip into these to find strength and meaning. Isn't it strange how we forget

Are our children not resilient anymore?

​ A 12-year-old client, who was being teased in school for her complexion, started harbouring thoughts of sadness, low esteem, and even self harm. During therapy, the girl pointed out that she had always been taken care of; she had never known this kind of stress, or learned how to deal with it. In my practice, I’ve heard similar expressions of helplessness, hopelessness and disillusionment, as other young clients deal with a broken relationship, poor grades, bullying or fallouts with friends. It makes me wonder – have we forgotten how to make our children resilient? Read my full column on

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